Aunt Linda is the sort of woman who puts fear in the heart of every introverted woman married to a soldier. Why? Because Aunt Linda set the standard as the consummate military wife for twenty years. She loved the adventure of changing stations, meeting new people, and throwing dinner parties.
Once, having just arrived at a new duty station, this fearless military wife sent invitations to all of the neighbors. Please join us for a progressive dinner on Saturday evening. If you’d like to serve as one of the hosts, let us know. More than two dozen couples joined in on the festivities—and remain friends twenty years later.
I, on the other hand, fail to follow Aunt Linda’s example. An impending move? I break out in hives. Mandatory fun? My least favorite activity. Host a dinner party for the unit? I wake up with night sweats. God did not bless me with the gift of hospitality.
However, a quick study of scripture reveals the exhortation to “practice hospitality”. (Romans 12:13) According to Merriam-Webster, the word practice means “to perform or work at repeatedly so as to become proficient”. In other words, all believers—even those inclined to avoid a crowd–are called to extend hospitality.
Hoops and Hospitality
In my case, practicing hospitality is a lot like high school basketball. Let me explain. I grew up in a town tucked between wheat fields and boasting fewer than 200 people. Because there were limited entertainment alternatives, high school basketball reigned as the king of sports. Unfortunately, I was gifted with neither careful aim nor steady hand. Determined to succeed, I spent hours practicing. Shoot. Dribble. Jump. Finally, I earned a starting position on the team.
In the same way, Christians are called to practice hospitality. By exercising hospitality, we learn to “Put self aside, and help others get ahead.” (Phil. 2:3-MSG) Invite. Invest. Intercede. And, one day, God will grow us into completion (Phil. 1:6) How will our feeble attempts produce results?
First, when our focus involves sharing Christ’s love rather than masking personal insecurity or concern, God receives the glory. Are we unwilling to invite someone into our homes because the dust has settled on the top of the refrigerator or there are bread crumbs on the floor? If so, then pride is impeding our impact for Christ. Do we claim shyness as a reason for failing to minister to the needs of others? Perhaps He desires to grow us through our weakness. As Philippians 2:4 reminds us, “Each of you should look not only to your interests, but to the interests of others. Your attitude should be that of Christ Jesus: who, in being very nature God…made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant.”
Demonstrating obedience to Christ through hospitality also makes a difference in a hurting world. After all, how many people are struggling with divorce, illness, or job loss? And, as a part of the military community, each of us is regularly exposed to other women managing the trials of deployment, “single” parenting, and loneliness. Who might Christ want you to encourage?
Four Easy Ways to Practice Hospitality
While hospitality often takes the form of dinner parties or large get-togethers, four alternative ideas are listed below.
- Coffee-klatch Close relationships are often fostered in small groups. Why not invite one or two ladies to join you for coffee and conversation on a regular basis? Keep things simple and meet at a local coffee shop.
- Baby Swap Have you noticed a young mother struggling to manage parenting and personal time? Offer to host a playtime at your home or babysit her children once a month.
- Silently Supportive Contact your local Wives Club or church group and suggest your home serve as a meeting place for a Military Wives Bible study or prayer group. You provide a welcoming environment while the group’s leader organizes all other details.
- Freezer Pleasers Gather a group once a month to boil, bake, and baste a variety of freezer meals. Consider donating one meal each to a family new to the community or to a spouse with a newly deployed soldier.
I may always prefer a quiet room to a crowd, but I also want to demonstrate obedience to Him. Will I ever eagerly anticipate mandatory fun? Unlikely. Am I destined to assume the role of party-planner extraordinaire? Only if paper plates are involved. Can He teach me to practice hospitality in order to impact the lives of others? Absolutely. When do you want to meet for coffee?