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Posts Tagged ‘Perfectionism’

 

There is only one thing worth being concerned about ...It will not be taken from her.In a world of selfies and Pinterest-perfect images, it’s easy to succumb to the pressures of who we should be.

Maybe you feel the pressure to be that stay at home mom--every floor spotless,each child neatly combed and perfectly dressed. But, instead? You haven't had time to look at your own reflection since… Click To Tweet

Maybe you feel the pressure to be that stay at home mom–every floor spotless, each child neatly combed and perfectly dressed. But, instead? The dog left a trail of wet paw prints across the family room carpet and you haven’t had time to look at your own reflection since yesterday.

Perhaps you bear the weight of living up to the impossible image of the wife and mother who manages it all...all the while nimbly weaving throughout the day in a pair of kitten heels and a sleek pencil… Click To Tweet

Perhaps you bear the weight of living up to the impossible image of the wife and mother who manages it all. Working the nine-to-five job; carpooling children from one soccer lesson to the next; high-fiving your husband on the way out the door—all the while nimbly weaving throughout the day in a pair of kitten heels and a sleek pencil skirt.

It could be you long for less of busy and a lot more of Jesus.#fewersocialexpectations#fewerchurchobligations#balance#noisnotabadword Click To Tweet

It could be that you long for less of busy and a lot more of Jesus. While goals can be wonderful, they often seem misleading. Misdirected. Misinformed. Instead of taking me deeper into relationship with Christ, they pull me away from Him. Rather than guiding me toward connection with the Father, they pull at from every side. Social expectations. Church obligations. Family needs.

Before long, I'm struggling to find Jesus at the bottom of the pile. I know he's there; waiting patiently.#choosethebetterpart#restinhim Click To Tweet

Before long, I’m struggling to find Jesus at the bottom of the pile. I know he’s there; waiting patiently to push a bedraggled strand of hair from my face. I can almost see him smiling as I kneel at his feet, my head leaning against his knee as I sigh. The sort of sigh you can’t help letting go of once you acknowledge how weary you’ve become.

“You’ve finally chosen the better part.” I know the words. I’ve read them before, but today they’re meant for me. Do you hear his gentle voice speaking to you, as well?

“Choose the better part. Come to me…and I will give you rest. The Lord doesn’t see things the way people see them.” (Lk. 10:42, Matthew 11:28-30, 1 Sam. 16:7)

Take a moment, daughter of Christ. Pause. Breathe. There is no pressure with him. No person you must be or become. He loved you long before you existed and will love you far beyond the day time expires. The pressures of this world will soon pass away, but the promise of His holy presence will fill our hearts forever.

 

Challenge of the Week- This week, I’m inviting you to join me in a challenge! Spend 20 minutes (more or less) every day with Jesus. You might prayer walk, enjoy a praise and worship time, write in a prayer journal, or read the Bible. Whatever it is, I’d love to know how this practice impacts the pressure you feel to perform or be the “perfect” mom or wife. Send me an email at tammy.kennington@gmail.com or respond in the comments below to let me know.

Peace and grace,

Tammy

I often link up with the following wonderful bloggers:

Mondays  Sunday Thoughts / InstaEncouragements/ Anita Ojeda Mandy and Michele

Tuesdays RaRa Linkup /GraceFull Tuesday / Tell His Story/Anchored Abode,

Wednesdays   Recharge Wednesday Welcome Wednesday /LetsHave Coffee/ Porch Stories

Thursdays Heart Encouragement  /  Tune In Thursday  /Salt and Light /  Five Minute Friday

Friday Counting My Blessings, Faith on Fire , Blogger Voices Network , Embracing the Unexpected

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You are more than enough to Him..png

Less than six puts you at risk. At risk for disease and diminished returns at work, home and play. At risk for depression, hypertension and inattention. At risk for a long list of unsavory outcomes and issues.

They are the one in three. Are you? Am I?

Have we joined the I-can’t-sleep-there’s-too-much-to-do party? Paced ourselves against the clock as if it’s an enemy rather than a friend. Enslaved ourselves to perfection, production, or performance.

During my college years I strode from one building to the next bearing an invisible backpack crammed with the weighty effects of self-doubt, unworthiness, and inability. Over and over, I’d shove those burdens deep within the confines of that imperceptible pouch.

Fearing Someone or Anyone would notice, I forced myself to achieve. To prove that I could accomplish. To justify my worth.

Motivated by the overwhelming fear of not being enough, I allowed for recovery only after rigorous, compelling dedication to study.  Sleep and rest were optional and I had the ulcer to prove it.

If the clock is your master, friend, have you considered what might be driving your desire for unattainable faultlessness? Unreachable achievement? Matchless efficiency?

Some may placate their incessant need for control through industry. Others might feel worth notice only through accomplishment–whether it’s a perfectly polished home or an unfading smile that refuses to allow vulnerability with friends or family.

If you are the woman driven by the need to be enought, can I remind you that you are more than enough to Him? Click To Tweet

If you are the woman driven by the need to be enough, can I remind you that you are more than enough to Him? You were more than enough for the heavenly king to lay aside His crown and exchange it for flesh. You were more than enough for an innocent Sovereign to endure every insult and accusation at a mockery of a trial. You were more than enough for the Lamb to sacrifice all in order that he might claim you as part of the fold. You were more than enough, Daughter, for the Father to rise triumphant–living proof that death has no hold on either Him or you.

When we deny the accusatory whipping boy of perfection or set aside the relentless  burden of responsibility and invite God to take it upon himself, then we’ll step into the rest he has promised.

Will you move into the place of holy peace today, friend? Jesus is calling. Click To Tweet

Will you move into the place of holy peace today, friend?

Jesus is calling.

“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” (Matthew 11:29-30 MSG)

 

 

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eaglefly

The moment I heard the words filter through the radio of our crumb-sprinkled family car, my heart responded with a question?  Am I that woman?  The message resounded and I’ve been considering it for more than a week–long enough for me to admit that this is one of my day-by-day, moment-by-moment struggles.  It may be yours, too.

What is this self-imposed, self-focused, self-degrading habit we battle each day?  Perfectionism.

It afflicts co-workers, Bible study leaders, young mothers, old mothers, neighbors, and friends.  Always striving…she is the woman never quite satisfied with self.  And deep in her empty places she has somehow mistaken the desire for acceptance…approval…love for a twisted version of if-then. 

If I can just lose five more pounds then he’ll respect me.

If I earn this degree then I’ll finally believe I’m smart.

If I keep my house clean enough then I’ll know I’m a good housewife.

If  my children are at the top of their class then I can trust myself as a mother.

If I join one more church committee then God will know I’m a committed Christian.

 

But all of the if’s just end up as not enough.  There is always another goal…something else to prove…a feeling of not quite meeting the mark.

Why?  Because we’ve forgotten the mercy of His love, acceptance, and approval.   With Christ, there is an abundance of all our heart seeks.   The one who is Perfection has released us from the need to prove our goodness or worth.

We can stop striving, dear Friend.  Just belonging to Perfection is enough.

 

Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.  (Col. 3:23-24)

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